Thursday, July 23, 2009

The Ugly Truth with Katherine Heigl

My interview with Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler at the Ugly Truth Junket

Opposites attract: Katherine Heigl contemplates Gerard Butler’s rough charm in The Ugly Truth.

Opposites attract: Katherine Heigl contemplates Gerard Butler’s rough charm in The Ugly Truth.


By Andrea Warner

LOS ANGELES — A dark-haired woman, tall and thin, lingers near the French doors of the ballroom in the Four Seasons Beverly Hills hotel. She is pretty, and disarmingly proper in a navy dress sprinkled with white polka dots. But nothing about her screams “Movie star!” the way Gerard Butler’s presence does when he strides into the room moments later. In fact, Katherine Heigl does incognito with such practiced ease (likely as a result of her paparazzi-plagued existence) that almost none of the reporters awaiting her arrival recognize the woman of the hour until she takes a seat behind a bank of microphones and flashes the famous smile that has graced Grey’s Anatomy for five seasons, and proved a box-office boon for the hit comedies Knocked Up and 27 Dresses.

Heigl’s recognizable long blonde tresses have been replaced by shorter, brown locks, but there’s no disguising the quick wit and sharp tongue that have become her hallmarks — for better or worse — over the last several years. Within seconds of sitting down, she offhandedly jokes that she “doesn’t have hair on that show” — referring to her Grey’s character Dr. Izzie Stevens, who is suffering from cancer — so she can do what she wants with her look.

Reported efforts to reign in Heigl and put a cap on her candid nature have obviously been unsuccessful. And that’s perfectly in keeping with the very reason for this press gathering: to talk about Heigl and Butler’s new R-rated comedy, The Ugly Truth.

A raunchy battle-of-the-sexes tale, Truth is a modern twist on the Katherine Hepburn / Spencer Tracy comedies of yore — with liberal doses of swearing, simulated orgasms, and twin bikini babes wrestling in Jell-O. Heigl plays Abby Richter , the socially awkward, romantically challenged producer of a fledgling morning news program who has a checklist of criteria for the perfect man. Mike Chadway (Butler) is the host of a chauvinistic late-night cable show in which he dispenses wisdom about “the ugly truth” of men and women. And wouldn’t you know it? When Mike is brought on board Abby’s show, his bare-knuckle take on sex and attraction gives it the ratings boost it desperately needs. Abby even ends up seeking his advice to try to land the hot doctor who lives next door. Inevitably, crazy antics ensue.

Heigl sees Truth as deeply funny, but doesn’t think it’s a straightforward take on contemporary male-female dynamic. “I would hope that it’s an exaggeration of what men and women are like,” she says. “I know a lot of men who joke like Mike, but I don’t think I know any guys who are really like him.”

Butler laughs and leans into his microphone. “I gotta say, I think Katie’s deeply flawed in knowing what goes on in a lot of men’s minds,” he says. “Or she hangs out with a breed of way more sophisticated male than I am — which wouldn’t be difficult.”

As anyone who follows the gossip columns knows, Heigl’s breed of male tends to be in direct relationship to whatever controversy she’s inadvertently courting at the time. In 2006, she publicly called out her Grey’s colleague, Isaiah Washington, after he allegedly referred to their co-star (and Heigl’s close friend), T.R. Knight, as a “faggot.” The following year, after starring in Judd Apatow’s Knocked Up, she was quoted as saying the film was “a little sexist,” and that it “painted the women as shrews” — statements that resulted in members of the media labelling her a “traitor,” “hypocritical,” and “ungrateful.” And last year, there was speculation that Heigl had asked to be released from her Grey’s contract so she could concentrate on movies, but it was Knight who ended up getting turfed, whereas Heigl’s cancer-afflicted Izzy seems to have survived the death knell.

Heigl’s penchant for outspokenness may have earned her a reputation for being difficult, but the reality, at least according to Butler and Ugly Truth director Robert Luketic, is anything but.

“What amazes me about Katherine is she can pick up a script with last-minute rewrites and look at it and say, ‘Right, ready,’ whereas this one here,” says Luketic, gesturing at Butler, “is, like, shitting Tiffany cuff links over everything, and he’s gotta read it and absorb it.

“There’s this shorthand I have working with Katherine; there’s this magic and light that she brings to her work. Apart from how professional she is, I also like her as a person.” So much so that the two just wrapped another film, tentatively titled Five Killers, due out in 2010.

“I’m no action hero,” Heigl says about the making of Five Killers, which is about assassins. The Ugly Truth’s physical comedy is more her speed, wherein her character’s dorky side manifests itself in a variety of physical — and embarrassing — challenges. At various points, Heigl hangs by her knees from a tree wearing only underwear; launches herself into spazzy happy dances; and wears vibrating underwear to a dinner party, resulting in a series of public climaxes. Heigl giggles when Butler and Luketic joke about the 35 set-ups it took to nail the latter scene, and the “authenticity” of the orgasms. “Can you imagine [if they were real]? Yes, I’m very method,” she says, laughing. “It was physically exhausting, though. I mean, at the end of the day, I felt like I’d done a marathon. No one wants to orgasm 35 times.”

But the film’s stars and director are banking on audiences wanting to watch it, and other more “adult” affairs, on the big screen. “It’s not all cocks and vag,” Luketic says, before catching himself. “Wait, did I just say that?”

Heigl encourages him, explaining, with her trademark honesty, why movies like The Ugly Truth and their R-rated language feel so, well, natural to her. “I love raunchy humour,” she admits. “What makes me laugh the hardest, it’s not terribly sophisticated. I’m a 30-year-old woman, and as much as I love younger audiences, I wanna tell a real story about people my age, and we throw ‘fuck’ around a lot. When you have to censor it, it feels a little too cute... The ability to be crass, to say ‘cock,’ that felt real to me. That’s the real world I live in with my family and friends.”

Ah, the beauty of the ugly truth.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Ex Norwegian

My interview with Ex Norwegian was in the Charleston City Paper last week.

Ex Norwegian gains international momentum
Miami Beach indie band: not on Standby

By Andrea Warner


With both a name and an album title taken from Monty Python, it's an easy mistake to think that indie-pop band Ex Norwegian are a quartet of Anglophiles or expat comedy fiends just looking to fulfill the American rock 'n' roll dream. But that's only partly true.

In reality, the band is a group of 20-somethings from sun-drenched, coconut oil-soaked Miami Beach. The group's been performing together for a year, but the hype surrounding them is massive, thanks to a relentless touring schedule and the success of a new debut album, Standby, which is full of hooky experiments that navigate folk, pop, and rock, paying tribute to bands from The Shins to The Kinks.

Roger Houdaille, 27, lead singer/songwriter, put together the group after performing as a solo artist for a few years. He recruited high school friend Carolina Souto, 24, to play bass, Arturo Garcia to take the prime role behind the drum kit, and Billie G on the guitar.

Within months of forming, Ex Norwegian had already been invited to the biggest, and most influential party in an independent band's foundation: College Music Journal's (CMJ) New York-based new music festival for college music stations. The weekend-long music marathon — a breeding ground for hobnobbing, discovering new talent, and relentless self-promotion — proved to be just the kick-start the band needed, and set the pace for a grueling but exciting first year.

"We were gonna take it slow, like, start touring next year, but then suddenly we had to get to New York," Rogers says. "We arrived on one of the last days and went to the hub of everything, and there were actually people who knew us and our songs and were singing to us, and it was kind of like, 'Wow.' We were surprised at that, but it gave us a vote of confidence."

A further boost to the Ex Norwegians' self esteem was an invitation to play on the Sky News channel hugely popular European show Sky Live that broadcasts their live performance to millions of people.

"It was just this random opportunity," Houdaille says. "They queue you, and we just kinda sing and have no idea what's going on. And then afterwards you have people in Ireland saying, "We saw you live!," and my mom, who lives in Paris, was like 'Yeah, we saw you live, I'm so excited.' The best part is our guitarist at the time, he had no idea it was live and was totally calm, and he's wondering why we're so nervous, and we're like, 'Dude, we just played to millions of people, literally."

For all the international accolades, though, Houdaille admits that playing in Charleston is actually at the top of Ex Norwegian's wish list.

"We booked this show first," he says of the tour planning. "We played Columbia a while back, and that was one of our greatest shows. They told us, 'Columbia's great, but you gotta go to Charleston.'"

This might just be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Decemberists

My interview with The Decemberists (one of my all-time fave bands) appears online this week.

The Decemberists: not entirely influenced by modern times.

The Decemberists: not entirely influenced by modern times.

The Decemberists give the drummer some
By Andrea Warner

Hyper-literate indie-rock isn’t the easiest way to make a name for oneself in the music business — unless you’re the Decemberists. The Portland, Oregon-based outfit has five albums to its credit, having built a loyal and ever-growing fanbase on a bedrock of epic lyrical concepts, cleverness, and achingly morose-bittersweet-funny lyrics, all stitched together by the nasal-voiced and wacked-out imagination of the band’s perennial man-child, singer-songwriter Colin Meloy.

Also featuring Chris Funk (lead guitar), Jenny Conlee (keyboards), Nate Query (bass), and John Moen (drums), the Decemberists have been together almost 10 years, coming of age alongside indie-pop, folk, and rock peers like Death Cab for Cutie and Rilo Kiley. And while all three bands share a penchant for wordplay, it’s only the Decemberists who have made successful albums off such far-flung ideas, including Picaresque (Spanish satire about roguish scoundrels), The Crane Wife (Japanese folklore), and their latest album, The Hazards of Love, a vast rock opera that borrows heavily from English mythology and features baby-killing philanderers and other soothing images.

WE spoke with Moen over the phone in anticipation of the Decemberists’ two-night stand at the Vogue on July 21 and 22.

You’re playing two shows here. How will the nights differ from each other?
Moen: You know, I’m not entirely sure. I just talked to someone who led me to believe we’re maybe doing an all-request night or something like that, but I don’t know if that’s true.

Just a rumour?
It could well. I know we’ve talked about it in the past, not doing the same show both nights in certain places where we’re doing two shows. But I’m not sure that’s actually happening. Typically, I have no valuable information for you. How do you like them apples?

You show up, you do your job, they tell you what to play, and you go home.
It’s embarrassingly more true than you would like to know. I think I try to put as much into those performances as I can, but I really don’t always know what the next thing is.

How did everything come together with The Hazards of Love?
Mostly it’s Colin’s baby. We’ll kind of conceptualize together, [like] “Wouldn’t it be fun if we played a country record in a barn?” We’ll talk about atmosphere — we’re all fans of music and music history to a degree. We all romanticize the making of music a little bit with each other. It’ll kind of whet [Colin’s] appetite a little bit, one way or another; this one was mostly him listening to too much British folk music. That inspired him to put some of those elements together in what seems like a story format, and see how it all kind of laid out. It was leaving a lot up to chance, really. He identified elements from old folk songs that were recurring themes. The character Margaret, and shape shifting beasts...

A little murder...
Right. All these things... He kind of made a list of these things and started writing around that idea with a lot of dropped-D chords — as far as the key went — and just kind of kept building around that, and wrote the songs in the order they appeared. I think we shifted the order of two things in the recording, but mostly he came to us with a good map and demos of all of these songs, and we sort of put it together.

Some critics have knocked Hazards for being a rock opera, too grandiose. Do you care at all what people have to say when it comes to that?
I didn’t know anyone was knocking us until you told me that.

I’ve just crushed you?
Yeah. I’ll probably be sitting in the basement in a corner, rocking back and forth, weeping. I don’t know. I’m sensitive about people’s opinions; I’m less sensitive as the drummer in the band, because so many of the choices aren’t my choices. I fill my role and I try to do as much as I can to be a part of it, but as a drummer, sometimes you’re just playing the drums. But it’s part of the gig — I just stay away from it all, honestly. And the thing is, it doesn’t seem to matter. Enough people are buying the record to keep things interesting. It’s certainly not Beyoncé or something of that calibre, but it’s doing well enough; people are coming to the shows and having a really good time.

You’ve worked with a pretty wide array of musicians. What’s been a couple of the highlights of your different collaborations with different people?
Gosh. I got to play live with Elliott Smith on Saturday Night Live — that was really exciting. It was also followed quickly by me being kind of fired from his touring band, so that kind of soured the experience a little bit. But music’s like that; it’s fine. There’s lots of opportunities. As exciting as that moment was, I’ve had as much fun playing here with a buddy of mine named Pete Crebbs, who’s had bands for years: Hazel, back in the ’80s, [and] Golden Delicious in the early ’90s. His bands lately have been more on the local level, but we used to go play cover songs, and I had so much fun doing that. I muscled my way into Stephen Malkmus’s Jicks.

What’s next for the Decemberists?
Funny you should ask. We just had a meeting the other day about getting the next thing going, but it’s top secret. [Laughs] No, it’s not. I don’t really know how much I can divulge, but we’re definitely really fired up right now. I think feeling the love of music, there’s another record we’re going to try to record maybe [next] spring, so it won’t be a real long wait for another thing, for sure, should you be somebody anticipating the release of an album from the Decemberists.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Death Cab for Cutie

I got to interview Death Cab for Cutie! Read the article here or in this week's WE.
The Cuties themselves (from left): Nick Harmer, Ben Gibbard, Chris Walla, and Jason McGerr.

The Cuties themselves (from left): Nick Harmer, Ben Gibbard, Chris Walla, and Jason McGerr.

Credit: supplied

Indie-pop’s band of brothers still going strong after 10 years

By Andrea Warner

If you know a guy who wears black plastic-framed glasses, owns a closet full of artfully decorated t-shirts, and waxes poetic about every twee moment betwixt the making and the breaking of love gone awry, it’s likely he’s a Death Cab for Cutie fan.

The quartet toiled in relative obscurity for the first five years of its existence, ruling Seattle’s indie music scene and steadily gaining a global fan base, before breaking into the mainstream with their major label debut, 2005’s Plans. Ten years on, the group’s now considered one of the forefathers of indie-pop, and their last album, 2008’s Narrow Stairs, achieved something many thought impossible: it debuted at #1 on the Billboard charts.

The band’s humble Bellingham, Washington foundations — built squarely on fiercely loyal friendships — has helped keep Death Cab from becoming another Hollywood-style train wreck. Lead singer/songwriter Ben Gibbard is now engaged to actress and musician Zooey Deschanel. Guitarist and producer Chris Walla has founded his own recording studio in his Portland home, producing other indie giants like the Decemberists and Tegan and Sara. Drummer Jason McGerr mentored teenaged indie-pop sister act, Smoosh. Bass player Nick Harmer has preferred to stay out of the spotlight, making him all the more interesting to speak with about fame, friendship, and his possible future in a Journey cover band.

WE: Did you want to be a rock star when you grew up?

Nick Harmer: One, I’m not even sure if I’ve accomplished that yet. [Laughs] I definitely wanted to be in a rock band. When I was really young, I wanted to be in, like, Motley Crew or Twisted Sister. I liked to draw pictures of myself with spiked wrist bands and pyrotechnics going off behind me. I always loved playing music, but I never once had that moment where I was like: ‘This is my career.’ I mean, I’m still not sure if this is what I want to do as a career or if it’s some extended awesome hobby. I almost feel like if I admit that I make my living playing music it’ll jinx it and everything will just disappear or something. I hope that I’m 55 years old playing in a casino someday.

That would be awesome.

Right? Just playing in, like, a Journey cover band. Or maybe I’ll be in a little jazz combo in restaurants on Thursday nights, just up in the corner.

Have you ever seen Big Elvis in Las Vegas? He’s this guy who used to weigh 800 pounds, and now he’s down to 400 pounds because he found God and stuff.

No! [Laughs] And he’s known as Big Elvis? Wow. I’m not a front man, I’m not an Elvis kind of guy. It’d be something like, Big Elvis with Big Bass Player.

In the early stages of Death Cab, did you think it was something that had legs and would last?

It’s weird to say. I mean, I knew the first practice we had, when things clicked, that there was something different about this combination of musicians and the music we were making. It was a very tangible kind of magic where you felt almost goose-bumpy, you know?

And you all still speak to each other, which is more than some bands can say after a decade together.

Yeah, and I know this might sound a little heart-on-the-sleeve, but if, at the end of everything I still have three really close friends, that’s a win. There’s so much about what we do for a living that threatens to tear us apart on all kinds of levels. I mean, we’re friends and business partners and the fact that we’ve been able to iron out the creative, financial, and social dynamics, and still maintain a true friendship amongst it all is absolutely the cherry on top. That’s the core I want to protect.

I know so many people who count Death Cab’s albums as the soundtracks to their most intimate moments.

I’m in the band, but the albums become soundtracks to intimate moments for me, too. It’s kind of a strange thing to be part of making the music and also be listening to it. I mean, I’m not walking around listening to our music on headphones all the time. Early on when we were trying to decide what to record for an album, we were listening for that real emotional connective tissue. Our audience is composed of people like us. I look out at the crowd when we’re playing and almost everyone is people I recognize in one way or another, or the kind of people I would be friends with, or going to have drinks with.

What’s next for you guys?

Ben’s been writing a little bit, then these shows in July, and downtime for the rest of the summer. This fall we’ll generate ideas and start the process of another album. I don’t think we’ll wait as long as we did between Plans and Narrow Stairs. We’re excited about releasing more music more frequently, and maybe doing shorter tour cycles. We’d like to play as many shows in a shorter amount of time, but I really think the internet is part of the marketing tool. It’s really the indispensable fifth member of the band. Utilizing that to share music and change things up just a little bit so we don’t have that hamster wheel of record, go on tour for 18 months, take time off, repeat. That can get a bit stale feeling as a formula.

Futurebirds

My article on the great new band, Futurebirds, appears in the Charleston City Paper and online.

The Futurebirds' off-kilter pop
Wingin' It

By Andrea Warner

At first listen, the music of the Futurebirds might sound like some forgotten gem from the 1970s, but halfway through the group's eponymous debut EP, it becomes clear why this Athens-based band is generating more buzz than a beehive hit with a stick.

The group infuses their sound with a thoroughly modern spin, reinventing choral alt-country with contradictions aplenty.

Most of them share vocal duties and can claim multi-instrumental skills, with Carter King on drums, guitar, and banjo; and Payton Bradford also on drums, mandolin, and guitar. Daniel Womack alternates between guitar and banjo, while Thomas Johnson takes his turn on guitar, banjo, and mandolin. Brannen Miles plays bass, and Dennis Love tackles the steel drum. Jessica Holt, vocalist, is an occasional contributor.

Further evidence that the Futurebirds are indeed of the future, and not just a rediscovered relic? Check out the requisite displays of youthfulness: ill-advised facial hair, ironic T-shirts, and plenty of good-natured sarcasm and silliness at every turn. Example: King replies with an earnest "Yes, ma'am" when asked a question, and then gleefully attributes the band's success and hype to "a good night's sleep, thorough stretch routines, and calling our mothers every day."

Taking their name from a class King took on "poultry evaluation," the Futurebirds were originally just a bunch of friends playing in other bands, drinking at the same bar night after night. And then something changed.

"Last fall, we started getting together to play for fun, and we could just tell we were all on the same wavelength," King recalls. "On one occasion, we were playing some covers, screwing around. Payton was playing an upright piano which was completely indiscernible amongst the rest of us banging out annoyingly loud electric guitars. He was gritting his teeth and profusely sweating. His face was like a fire engine as he mercilessly beat the keys. He stood up and kicked his chair across the room, and continued to play what could, to this day, be the greatest inaudible piano solo ever played. Ever."

There aren't a lot of pounding piano solos on the Futurebirds' debut, but every song sounds perfectly homespun, as if it was recorded with a giant mic in the middle of a circle, with the band singin' and bangin' and strummin', guided only by instinct, not outcome. The EP matches the Futurebirds' personality perfectly: beautifully offbeat and slightly sloppy, full of rockin' hymns that could alternately soothe a drunk or incite a cowboy.

Funemployment!

My story on Funemployment appears in this week's WE

Faces of funemployment: Graphic designer Carlos Hernandez Fisher (left)  recently celebrated his last day of employment with a global telecommunications giant. Meanwhile, Astrid Elston and Brian Robinson are well on the path to entrepreneurial success thanks to the economic meltdown.

Faces of funemployment: Graphic designer Carlos Hernandez Fisher (left) recently celebrated his last day of employment with a global telecommunications giant. Meanwhile, Astrid Elston and Brian Robinson are well on the path to entrepreneurial success thanks to the economic meltdown.

Credit: Andrea Warner and Doug Shanks

Funemployment
By Andrea Warner

For plenty of people, the twaining of work and fun is merely a fantasy; something to daydream about to help whittle away the hours between 9:00 a.m. and 5:00 p.m. Work has always been just that: work, a guaranteed daily negotiation between your interests, aptitude, and the economy. And then a not-so-funny thing happened about a year ago: The bottom dropped out of the stock market, and a global reckoning saw big businesses crumble, banks collapse, and previously wealthy countries, like ours, face weakened job markets.

But out of the smoldering ashes of lost jobs, a burgeoning scene of independent, arts-loving entrepreneurs are turning unemployment on its head and ushering in a new era of “funemployment.” The term became an overnight viral sensation thanks to a widely-circulated June 3 article in San Francisco’s SF Weekly, chronicling the experiences of recently laid-off people who were collecting unemployment benefits and using their newfound time to reassess their career goals, and then launch their own creative businesses.

With the proverbial pink slips piling up and EI lines wrapping around city blocks, more and more Vancouverites are facing similar challenges, leading to our very own funemployment phenomenon.

THE DESIGNER

Carlos Hernandez Fisher, fresh off his last day of work for a global telecommunications giant, is now entering his second week of funemployment. He spent three years clocking in, learning the corporate jargon, but his first love, graphic design, continued to occupy his leisure time. Like many people, he kept imagining a day when he could pursue his passion for potential profit, but he wasn’t sure how to make the dream a reality — until the layoff.

“I was given a lot of notice, so I was ready for the news, but there was still a period of shock and adjustment,” Hernandez Fisher says. “It wasn’t until a few weeks after finding out that I started making peace with the situation and started seeing it as an opportunity rather than a crisis.”

He credits close friends with encouraging him to try to create a career out of his graphic design interests. But the big push was seeing a Venn diagram on how to be happy in business, created by professional strategist, Bud Caddell.

“In it, happiness is the intersection of what we do well, what we want to do, and what we can be paid to do,” Hernandez Fisher says. “Design makes me happy and I’d like to think I do it well, so now it’s just a matter of finding a way to make it pay the bills.”

THE JEWELER

It’s a story that’s familiar to Astrid Elston, owner and designer of Fire & Ice Creations. Elston was a sales manager for a tourism trade show when she was laid off in January.

“You have that sense of, ‘Oh my god, what am I gonna do?’” Elston recalls. “It’s hard to say the layoff was a relief, but, I also had the sense that it might be a blessing in disguise.”

Elston had spent several years crafting recycled glass into jewelry and home decor pieces as a hobby while she worked in tourism, an industry that’s recently shouldered the brunt of the economic meltdown.

“I was tired of being at the whim of other people’s hiring and firing patterns so, after being laid off for the last time, I decided, ‘That’s enough’,” Elston says. “I wanted to put my entrepreneurial spirit to work, take all my business experience, and make my own money, have my own hours and work really hard to build something for myself.”

Elston signed up for Douglas College’s self-employment program to help provide a better foundation on which to build her business. Now, seven months later, her website, FireIceCreations.com, is fully functional, her jewelry is available at a variety of retailers, and she plans to set up residence at several craft and design shows by the end of the year. But Elston admits that she still occasionally doubts herself.

“You are everything in the company,” Elston explains. “I am the ad person, the sales and marketing, the accountant, the production person, and you’re the person who makes or breaks it. It’s can be extremely overwhelming. You’re the person who needs to make all those calls or no one’s going to call you.”

THE BAKER

Brian Robinson is four months into his funemployment foray. Like Hernandez Fisher and Elston, he was initially dismayed when informed of his layoff from managing an ESL school in downtown Vancouver.

“My first response was, ‘What am I gonna do now?’” Robinson says. “I was depressed. I wanted to change direction. I wanted a job that would give me a bit more of a future, more satisfaction, and better rewards, financially and everything.”

Putting his love of food, cooking, and baking front and centre has helped Robinson re-prioritize his career goals. He launched Robinson Fine Foods (RobinsonFineFood.blogspot.com), and currently has a table at the monthly Blim Art Market where he hawks gourmet foccaccia breads, Italian pies, and a variety of sweet and savoury goods.

“When I was first laid off, the potential of being on EI for all of those months was kind of scary,” Robinson says. “I joined EMBERS, a part-time self-employment program. It’s really useful. They’re making me think about what I really want to do, and they’re getting me to do market research and the feasibility of how it works. So my idea has really taken shape since those classes.”

Robinson intends to set up a bakery and delivery service catering to workplaces or areas with fewer options for interesting food choices. The layoff has helped him focus on what’s important to him in a career, but he admits that he’s still a ways off from meeting his financial goals through self-employment.

“I’m very motivated to see this happen, and I get a lot of satisfaction out of working on it and seeing the pieces in place,” Robinson says. “But at the back of my mind, I’ve still got that thing that I need to find some sort of job, get a decent income coming in, and that will provide a stable grounding to kick this off. To feed the real love and build contacts in the industry, I’m only looking in the food world now for additional work.”

THE NEW “MARKET” ECONOMY

Making a living from one’s art may still be a challenge, but thanks to a confluence of events — the recession, social networking web sites, and a huge momentum in DIY culture — Vancouver-based indie artists have more avenues than ever to launch their businesses.

Yuriko Iga is the owner of Blim, a Main Street arts-based store and studio that offers workshops in a variety of disciplines that’s a sort of ground zero for DIY enthusiasts. She’s recently launched the monthly Blim Art Market, and sees the recession as a huge opportunity for a new culture of craft.

“Depression is one of the best things that can happen,” Iga says. “It’s a shame we have to force ourselves into these situations, but if that’s what it takes to get back to grassroots styles of business. That’s what meant to be. Often in First World countries, there’s this inflated sense of mega business, and we just all think it’s normal. I think the economy being up and down is natural, and I think it’s good when it’s down because people rely less on spending and are forced to become more creative with their time and money. Sometimes having stuff taken away is a good thing.”

For his part, Hernandez Fisher agrees.

“I think the recession is an opportunity for a lot of people to step away from working just to pay bills and look at what they can do that is going to make them happier on a day-to-day basis,” he says. “I think the boom in things like [online craft market and hub] Etsy, Blim, and [online craft market] Threadless, and the removal of barriers to entry means that it’s now possible to work for yourself without having to put out a huge initial investment first. The web, blogs, and social networks can open avenues that previously didn’t exist. Before, if you left a job and really wanted to spend your time cooking, say, that had to be what you did in between earning a living. Now, there’s any number of people who have turned that kind of passion into blogs, book deals, and storefronts, like AmateurGourmet.com and ThePioneerWoman.com.”

To that end, Hernandez Fisher has already launched his own web site, CharmingNinja.com, and plans to use it as a combination portfolio/storefront for his designs. He’s also planning on making use of local markets like Blim, Portobello West, Spend on Trend, and Got Craft? as he creates more art and merchandise.

For those seeking advice on how to make the most out of craft and fashion markets like the ones mentioned above, Blim’s Market Vendor workshop this Saturday, July 11, from 12 p.m. to 5 p.m. might be just the answer. For a $5-$10 sliding scale fee, Iga and her friend Lisa Prentice, a veteran jewelry designer, will offer their combined 15-plus years of advice.

“We have all this information, and you see people and what they sell, and they have all this potential but they’re just not doing certain things,” Iga explains. “We’re both big fans of [celebrity chef and star of television’s Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares] Gordon Ramsay. I love how he goes in there and helps people get back their self-esteem. So we just thought we’d do a session and help people like Gordon Ramsey, but not swearing or making people cry.” She laughs. “You know, the softer approach.”

THE SECRET TO SUCCESS

Meghan Spong, publisher and founder of the Vancouver-based start-up Benjamin Brown Books, found herself at the forefront of the funemployment trend. Laid off when Raincoast Books shuttered its publishing program, Spong found herself looking for work in a small market saturated with talent. So, after crossing paths with an aspiring author of childrens books, she decided it was time to start her own publishing company. Two books later (Wenda the Wacky Wiggler, Lily and Lucy’s Shadow), and with a third on the way in the fall, Spong isn’t quite ready to be held up as the poster woman for funemployment, but she does had some advice for those braving the unknown.

“There are a lot of naysayers around all the time who are like, ‘Oh, you can’t do that, the economy’s bad’,” Spong says. “But, particularly in a recession, that’s when people are really responsive to inspiring ideas. So if you’re passionate about something, figure out a way outside of the box that you can make it work. Keep open to the possibilities. It’s not going to necessarily look like how you envisioned it, but for me, the essence is making books. I don’t care where the funding comes from, and I don’t really care if I’m rich and super profitable, but I’m getting to make books, which is my passion, so I would say stay focused on what you love to do.” 


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Mat Kearney

My interview with Mat Kearney is out in the Charleston City Paper this week.

Mat Kearney is a West Coast guy on a Nashville adventure

A new sound in the city

Mat Kearney is the kind of golden boy who makes everything seem easy. Scholarship-worthy athlete? Yep. Gifted photographer and writer? Apparently. An accidental record deal after deciding to ride along for a summer road trip to Nashville? Of course. Even his sound is a fusion of fortunes that probably shouldn't work well together, all about love and loss, the hopeless and the inspiration-drenched, sung in a voice that sounds almost exactly like Coldplay's Chris Martin. He's been so touched by an angel that eventually T-shirts will be mass-produced to read, "It's a Kearney kind of world."

Not that the 30-year-old contemporary Christian musician doesn't work his ass off for what he's got. Between his best-selling 2006 debut Nothing Left to Lose and the new follow-up, City of Black and White, Kearney estimates he played 500 shows in three years, a first-hand education that couldn't help but impact his songwriting.

"The first album was just a little bedroom project that took off," Kearney says. "Nothing Left to Lose was young idealism, and it was kinda me stepping out and saying 'Let's see what happens.' City of Black and White is like, I've landed in this community, there's heartbreak, there's some bad things that happened, but just as many rich things, too."

Kearney's debut was an earnest mash-up of influences: country, folk, pop, rock, soul, gospel, and hip-hop, peppered with spoken-word/hip-hop segments throughout.

"I found this whole voice, which lead to me grabbing my roommate's guitar, and it was just this glove that fit — songwriting," Kearney says. "I was pretty influenced by poetry and the spoken-word element, and, honestly, it was funny, because the hip-hop could be kind of considered a novelty on one level, but it caused me to stand out from the crowd."

Particularly the crowd in Nashville. He didn't expect anything to happen when he tagged along on his buddy's road trip for the summer, but when people started responding to his sound, he kissed college goodbye and made Nashville his home base. A short time later he got his big break.

"I was playing at this little tiny college show," Kearney recalls. "This record guy who'd signed John Mayer showed up, and he was like, 'Hey, I really wanna work with you,' and I looked at the label and was like, 'Okay, let's do it.' It was funny ... when he offered me a deal, all these other big-time labels came along and started throwing money and power at me, but, I don't know, I just wanted to work with him, and I've worked with him ever since."

Nothing Left to Lose became a huge success and a go-to resource for television series like Grey's Anatomy and Scrubs, both of which have a reputation for "discovering" cool indie pieces of longing or lyricism to underscore their characters' highs and lows. Well over 15 television shows have used Kearney's music over the last three years.

"It's odd and amazing and different," Kearney laughs. "There's moments where you're like, 'Really? The song was used for that?' I've been very generous with that. For some reason I don't think my song being on a show can do any damage to my song, you know? My song's my song. People use my songs in all kinds of situations, some that I think are cheesy and some that are amazing, but that's how my songs enter people's lives."

Kearney's songs have certainly brought plenty of big names to his everyday life, and he admits that sometimes he still pinches himself because he can't believe it's real.

"Kenny Chesney, of all people, called me to come down and play a song with him and the Wailers," Kearney laughs. "It was such an eclectic gathering: The Wailers, of like, Bob Marley and the Wailers, Chesney, and me playing honky-tonk in downtown Nashville. Super odd, but I loved it. There are just people everywhere. I met Patty Griffin at a clothing store a couple months ago. I walked out of a Bob Dylan show with Emmylou Harris. Keith Urban came in looking for his wife [Nicole Kidman] at the studio. There's this awesome thing happening in Nashville right now. Just a really cool rock scene, but not necessarily the typical L.A. thing. A little more grounded in tradition."

Nashville, his adopted home, seems the true recipient of the bittersweet love letter that is City of Black and White.

"It was hard for me in Nashville at first," Kearney says. "Being a West Coast kid, I thought it was an odd place, but I fell in love with it. It's a town that's humble, it values humility, it doesn't put up with fluff. It's like the song is king in the music world, so people are always chasing after great songs, and you feel like you're walking around in the shadows of these giants, you know?"

Home sweet home, Mr. Kearney.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Othello

My review of Othello, on until mid-September at Vancouver's Bard on the Beach, appears in this week's WE.
Michael Blake as Othello (left) and Brad Frazer as Iago, in Bard on the Beach’s Mainstage production of Othello.

Michael Blake as Othello (left) and Brad Frazer as Iago, in Bard on the Beach’s Mainstage production of Othello.

OTHELLO
Running in repertory with The Comedy of Errors, to Sept. 26 on the Mainstage in Vanier Park, 8 p.m. Tickets $18-$34 from 604-739-0559 and BardOnTheBeach.org

By Andrea Warner
Like some other Shakespeare plays, Othello, a powerful and damning indictment of jealousy, self-doubt, and betrayal, has always dwelled in the thorny briar patch of ‘Is it racist?’ Given that, at its most stripped-down, it’s essentially the story of a black man’s life ruined by a white man’s vengeful schemes, the question is a fair one, but one this production makes no attempt to answer. Instead, director Dean Paul Gibson amps up the play’s dark humour, dulling the seething rage that should propel Othello from start to finish.

The titular character (Michael Blake) is a Moorish (Renaissance English for “black”) general in the Venetian army who is married to Desdemona (Naomi Wright), a white Senator’s daughter. When he promotes Cassio (Kevin MacDonald) over his right-hand man, Iago (Bob Frazer), the latter secretly swears revenge and sets out to sabotage Othello. Thus begins an elaborate scheme, wherein Iago convinces Othello that Desdemona and Cassio are having an affair, driving Othello into a jealous — and ultimately murderous — rage.

The charming Blake and Wright have great chemistry together, from their playful young love to the final, horrifyingly violent struggle. Wright, the beating heart of this production, possesses a confident elegance that anchors every scene she’s in, particularly those shared with Iago’s wife, Emilia (Jennifer Lines).

However, it is a cruel irony that a truly successful Othello hinges on a great Iago, and that’s where this production falls short. As with some of the other Bard on the Beach productions in which he has appeared, Frazer seems to be in a different play than everyone else. He bucks the melodic lilt of Shakespearean language, sounding instead like a thoroughly modern man raised on a steady diet of deadpan, sitcom-styled line delivery. His Iago rarely rises above the level of a high-school Machiavelli busily testing the sociological effects of gossip with menace so measly it dilutes Othello from black and white to a muted shade of grey.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Rachel Goodrich

My article on Rachel Goodrich appears in this week's Charleston City Paper!

Rachel Goodrich, like, plays a ukulele and sings

Miami Nice

For most people, Miami Beach likely calls to mind images of leathery, tanned retired folks shuffling between beach chairs and 5 p.m. dinner reservations, with the occasional dotting of late-night young clubbers melting in the heat as they grind to hip-hop and electronica dance anthems. You're forgiven if, when you heard "Miami Beach," you didn't think of a burgeoning underground indie scene, home to 25-year-old Rachel Goodrich, a thoroughly modern singer-songwriter with a 1930s vocal style, who also happens to be at the forefront of the global ukulele renaissance.

Goodrich cites an amalgamation of influences that have contributed to her self-described "shake-a-billy" sound, Neil Young and Patsy Cline included, but she credits a teenage boyfriend with pointing her in the direction of her first big influence.

"He was really into Joni Mitchell, and I didn't know much about her, but I soon got into her, and that's when I realized that maybe there's a chance, you know," Goodrich says. "I was never really too familiar with successful women in the industry."

Her second big influence came just a few years ago, when Goodrich visited her father and spotted the tiny stringed instrument that would become her signature. It was love at first sight.

"This ukulele was lying on his couch, and I was like, 'Wow, that's really cute. I really wanna play it,'" she recalls. "I took it home and wrote a couple songs in a couple days. I was so excited to have a new instrument in my hands, and yeah, it really took me elsewhere. It made me create, you know. It made me want to write and inspired me. It made me want to take things a little more seriously. Is that weird?" She laughs at herself as she ponders the concept.

Somewhat weirder is Goodrich's declaration that she recorded her debut album, Tinker Toys, released this spring, by accident.

"I actually kind of just walked into it," Goodrich admits cheerfully. "I didn't mean to record a record. A friend of mine, George Martinez, was like, 'Hey, come over to my place and we'll record a song.' His entire studio is in this bedroom, and I'm pretty much recording in his closet, you know, and the first song we recorded was 'Ukulele Water.' It kind of blew my mind. I was like, wow, this can really happen? It was exciting, so I was like, 'Let's do another one tomorrow.' Then we recorded 'Black Hole,' and we kept going. I walked in with no expectations, and it was all a surprise."

Less of a surprise at this point is Goodrich's decision to focus entirely on her music, embarking on her first major tour throughout North America last week. As she winds her way across the continent, ukulele at the ready, she has no desire to shake off the sun and fun of her hometown.

"Miami kinda lifts my spirits in a way," Goodrich says. "I feel like I can talk about demons and crazy things, but if you put it over a G chord, you know, everything'll be all right."

If anything, Goodrich's songs will just continue to prove to hipster indie enclaves like Brooklyn, Seattle, and L.A., that Miami Beach has plenty of treasures hidden in the hems of its flowered muumuu.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Theater of War

One of the best documentaries I've seen this year.

THEATER OF WAR

Starring Meryl Streep, Kevin Kline

Directed by John Walter

4 stars (out of 5)

By Andrea Warner

Most of us have only a passing knowledge of Bertolt Brecht, the pioneering German playwright who is perhaps most famous for his masterpiece, The Threepenny Opera. In the documentary Theater of War, director John Walter takes those loose threads of familiarity and weaves a complex, stirring, and at times genuinely brilliant tapestry of Brecht as an artist and rebel born desperately ahead of his time.

The film follows the action behind the scenes during the 2006 New York remounting of Brecht’s damning condemnation of people’s complicity in conflict, Mother Courage and Her Three Children. Written in 1939 while the committed Marxist was in exile from Nazi Germany, Mother Courage is the story of a war profiteer who refuses to acknowledge the moral cost of her livelihood and its effect on her family or herself. Big names like Meryl Streep (in the titular role) and Kevin Kline (as the Cook) contribute suitable star wattage, with Streep also anchoring the film with snippets of her performance and candid interviews.

Most fascinating, though, is Walter’s decision to position Theater of War within the context of New York City in 2006, just as North America begins its populist revolt against the Iraq War. Stimulating interviews with Tony Award-winning playwright Tony Kushner (who adapted Mother Courage for the production in question) and Tufts University professor Jay Cantor grapple with one pervasive question: Why are we so tied to what ultimately destroys us?

It is while parsing this all-too-human need for self-destruction that Theater of War is most successful — an electrical jolt to the neurons of apathy, and a call for reaction in the absence of action.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Eat, Drink, and be Married

Jackie Wong and I co-authored this guide to getting married for people who' d like to branch out from the conventional trappings of tradition or expense.

From selecting the invitations to cutting the cake, nothing about your wedding has to be typical — or overpriced.

From selecting the invitations to cutting the cake, nothing about your wedding has to be typical — or overpriced.

Eat, Drink, and be Married

By Jackie Wong and Andrea Warner


Modern-minded urbanites bound for wedded bliss face plenty of challenges on the road from “Will you marry me?” to “I do.” As soon as you put a ring on it, planning the party of your life becomes a claws-out battle of wits, as you and your other half plot, wheedle, and crunch to control inflated costs without sacrificing your shared sense of style. Savvy couples who want to break from convention while still fashioning a day to remember are increasingly seeking out cost-effective, innovative, and, most importantly, fun alternatives to the traditional White Wedding. Here are some options — all of them local — to help you do just that.

INVITATIONS
Escaping the exhausted — and expensive — cliché of wax-sealed, rose-scented wedding invitations is easy. Just ask Emily Carr grads Brandy Fedoruk and Rebecca Dolen, who co-founded the Regional Assembly of Text in 2005, offering a fanciful line of cards, stationery, and clothing — all of it influenced by typesetting techniques of yore, making use of the duo’s large collection of vintage typewriters and stamps, as well as a letterpress machine. (Please note that they do not sell or supply wedding invitations--they can only sell you the right stuff to do it yourself.) Look here for inspiration to make your own invitations, or seek Brandy and Rebecca’s expertise. Paper-Ya on Granville Island offers a downloadable wedding consultation form to get you started on making your own invitations, while the store itself offers one of Vancouver’s most comprehensive collections of paper from around the world, plus wooden stamps and wedding-specific stationery.

VENUES
Renting both a church and a reception hall can be costly and time-consuming, particularly the organizational efforts involved in moving the party from one venue to the next. Save time and money by considering just one location for the big day. Restaurants often offer big bang for your buck, taking care of food, the bar, servers, decorations, ambiance, and clean-up. Some of our favourites include La Terrazza, Brix, the Alibi Room, and Canvas Lounge, each of which offers unique rooms and delicious bites.

Community centres and halls can be transformed with just a few strings of lights, and stylish table and chair coverings. Cambrian Hall and Heritage Hall are just blocks away from each other, in beautiful buildings on Main Street. Roundhouse Community Centre offers the beautiful backdrop of False Creek at its back door, and Kitsilano’s St. James Hall still boasts the stained glass and pews from its days as a church, though nowadays it’s typically used as a concert venue.

CATERING
You could feed an entire village with the amount some caterers are wont to charge for a moderate-sized party. Really go the road less travelled and show off your impeccable — but unconventional — taste by bringing on board one of the city’s most beloved burger purveyors: Vera’s Burger Shack. The local mini-chain, which regularly takes the gold in WE’s Best of the City readers poll, will ply your guests with all the hamburgers and hot dogs they could want. (If any of your friends should turn their nose up at the idea of a burger at a wedding, it might be time to reassess that friendship.) Another meaty option is Memphis Blues Barbeque House, which offers its full menu selection — from brisket to ribs to chicken — and a wide array of side dishes for finger-lickin’ good fun that promises to leave everyone stuffed. And even vegetarians will find their taste buds jammin’ with jerk-infused items from The Reef, the Caribbean-themed restaurant that’s currently celebrating its 10th anniversary; they even offer a backyard-barbecue option if your party plans include the outdoors.

CAKES
Unless you decide to abide by the tradition of meticulously saving and freezing a portion of your wedding cake for consumption on your first anniversary, boring old white cake can be banned from the menu. Thanks to Vancouver’s impressive legion of independent bakers, your wedding cake can stand strong — and beautifully — as the memorable pièce de résistance to top off the ceremony. Coco Cake is the brainchild of Vancouver’s Lyndsay Sung, whose heartwarmingly twee creations might make you die of happiness, cute overload, or both. (Contact Sung through her website to custom-order cakes or cupcakes for special events.) And the ubiquitous Cupcakes stores do weddings, too. Founded by Victoria friends Heather White and Lori Joyce, Cupcakes offers a wide range of wedding cakes that you can custom-build online before placing your order. For an affordable cake made by a professional pastry chef, try Nina Hemme’s Tartlets (pictured, above left). And finally, if you’re in search of a traditional cake that won’t cost a fortune, look no further than Notte’s Bon Ton, a 76-year-old Vancouver institution where you can still find authentic black-forest amd diplomat cakes.


WHERE TO FIND IT:
Regional Assembly of Text (3934 Main, 604-877-2247 AssemblyOfText.com)
Paper-Ya (#9-1666 Johnston, 604-684-2534, Paper-Ya.com)
La Terrazza (1088 Cambie, 604-899-4449, LaTerrazza.ca)
Brix (1138 Homer, 604-915-9463, BrixVancouver.com)
The Alibi Room (157 Alexander, 604-623-3383, Alibi.ca)
Canvas Lounge (99 Powell, 604-609-9939, CanvasLounge.ca)
Cambrian Hall (215 E. 17th, 604-876-2815, WelshSociety.com)
Heritage Hall (3102 Main, 604-879-4816, HeritageHall.bc.ca)
Roundhouse Community Centre (181 Roundhouse Mews, 604-713-1800, Roundhouse.ca)
St. James Hall (3214 W. 10th, 604-739-9373, StJamesCommunitySquare.org)
Vera’s Burger Shack (various locations, VerasBurgerShack.com)
Memphis Blues Barbeque House (various locations, MemphisBluesBBQ.com)
The Reef (4172 Main St, 604-874-5375; 1018 Commercial Drive, 604-568-JERK; TheReefRestaurant.com)
Coco Cake (604-816-9922, CocoCake.com)
Cupcakes (various locations, 604-974-1300, CupcakesOnline.com)
Tartlets (121 E. 1st, North Vancouver, 604-724-7625, Tartlets.ca)
Notte’s Bon Ton (3150 W. Broadway, 604-681-3058, NottesBonTon.com)

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Sarah Slean

My interview with Sarah Slean appears in WE and at WestEnder.com

Sarah Slean: “I need to be constantly evolving” — and that means working outside the major-label industry.

Sarah Slean: “I need to be constantly evolving” — and that means working outside the major-label industry.

MUSIC: Sarah Slean revels in newfound freedom

With her intelligent songs, swan-like neck, and ruler-perfect posture, Sarah Slean personifies the word regal. Heck, even her speech patterns are so pleasantly polite and mannered, it’s hard not to mentally curtsy at the end of our conversation. (It’s no real surprise she called her 2008 album The Baroness.) The Toronto-based singer-songwriter (and part-time painter and photographer) has spent 10 years cultivating her cabaret-style pop, defying the traditional conventions of career pursuit with a lengthy sojourn in Paris and a baby grand piano at the ready.

Having amicably ditched long-time label Warner Music a few months ago, Slean is now officially self-employed, overseeing every aspect of her career — from her website to her costumes to carbon-offsetting her current Recessionista tour. While becoming a true Renaissance woman, she’s also found time to get engaged and become a university graduate (a Bachelor of Arts in music and philosophy, natch).

WE spoke with Slean over the phone from her home.

Can you talk a little bit about your decision to leave Warner and go indie?

Slean: Sure. I have nothing but great things to say about Warner Music. The people there were incredible. They did the very best with the system and machinery that exists [there], but for an artist like me who’s never really going to be a major radio artist — and I’m constantly changing my sound and experimenting. You know, I’m not doing one thing and making five albums and hoping people catch on. I need to be constantly evolving. And [Warner] perfectly understood that. I’m really excited now to have this business where I know every arm of it is ethical. It’s important to me to do that, and when you’re with a major company like that, you’re not really sure how things are going down. So, I really want to keep a watchful eye on my business and make sure it’s great.

Are you working toward a new album right now?

The next project for me is something called the Art of Time Ensemble. I did a record with these guys, coming out in June, and it’s a handful of jazz and classical musicians and me, and I chose 12 of my favourite songs by Canadian songwriters, and then we did cover versions of them arranged by people for this ensemble. It’s really cool. We recorded on tape — basically live takes — and we’re going to tour that in the fall. Basically, the remainder of the year I’m probably going to be writing.

What’s the biggest difference for you from being in your twenties to now being in your thirties?

[Laughs] Girls love this question! Isn’t this time the best? I’m doing this show on CBC this week about what you’d write in a letter to your 16-year-old self, and I’m thinking: Forget 16! I had it all figured out then. [At] 24, however? I was a real mess then. If I was to write a letter to that person, I’d say, Just relax! Relax and trust that the universe is taking care of you — even though you can’t tell — and everything is going to be fine. I remember some dark nights of the soul from my twenties when I thought, “I cannot go on.” And I can’t fathom having that thought now.

You talked a little bit about how you’re wanting to create different sounds. What are your influences?

Everything: when I read poetry, when I’m curious about the world — which is kind of a constant state for me. I read up on quantum entanglement, and I’m fascinated by all aspects of life. It’s so insanely diverse and complex; everywhere you look, you could pursue something for a lifetime. I’m looking out my window right now and there’s a seagull flying by, and I could study thermal currents forever and never know it all. That, to me, is what’s exciting about getting up every day.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

DOXA Film Festival

I got a chance to catch three of the DOXA screenings in advance, and I just love this festival so much. Here are the reviews that appeared in WE.

Awesome sidebar: Alexey Voevoda, the Russian arm wrestler in Pulling John, will be competing in the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver as part of the bobsled team. Finally, a reason to be excited about the Olympics! :)

Pulling John’s John Brzenk (right) takes on Sylvester Stallone.

Pulling John’s John Brzenk (right) takes on Sylvester Stallone.


PULLING JOHN
Directed by Vassiliki Khonsari and Sevan Matossian
Mon., May 25 at Vancity Theatre, 9 p.m.

Who knew that arm wrestling, a beloved pastime between drunks perched on bar stools, is actually a legitimate global sport — a sport that receives government funding in places like Russia and Japan? In Pulling John, two men — Travis Bagent, full of American bravado; and Alexey Voevoda, a hulking and determined Russian — pursue a post-Cold War wet dream, whereby each trains to vanquish 25-year world arm-wrestling champion John Brzenk. The humble Brzenk proves to be the most compelling figure, one so focused on his craft that at 18 years old he decided to become an airplane mechanic so he could fly free to arm-wrestling competitions all over the world. Pulling John often looks amateurish, but it’s fascinating, funny, and delivers a satisfyingly tense climax when its three subjects finally collide in a brief but breathtaking battle of bulging biceps. 3 stars (out of 5) —A.W.

NOBODY'S PERFECT
Directed by Niko von Glasow
Sat., May 23 at Vancity Theatre (1181 Seymour), 9 p.m.

Short or tall, fat or thin, society’s obsession with the perfect body takes on a different meaning in Nobody’s Perfect, a German doc that follows 12 people disabled in utero by the drug Thalidomide between 1957 and 1961. Director von Glasgow, who’s also disabled, sets out to interview and recruit others to pose nude for a photo book. But that bit of brave naughtiness ends up taking a backseat to a history of how Thalidomide came to Germany, and the people responsible for continuing to sell it even after it was declared lethal and dangerous in North America. In this respect, Nobody’s Perfect tries to be too many things to too many people. But, for all its flaws, the film’s subjects transcend survival, leading extraordinary lives under extraordinary circumstances. 3 stars (out of 5) —Andrea Warner

IN A DREAM
Directed by Jeremiah Zagar
Thurs., May 28 at Pacific Cinémathèque, 7 p.m.

This warts-and-all documentary about artist Isaiah Zarag, made by his filmmaker son Jeremiah, is a voyeur’s paradise. Over four decades, Isaiah has covered more than 50,000 square feet of Philadelphia with his mosaics, all with the support of his wife Julia, who has devoted her entire life to smoothing out the rougher edges of her husband’s eccentricities. In a Dream begins as an ode to his father’s art, but it takes a sharp left turn as Jeremiah digs deeper into his father’s past, unearthing abuse and mental breakdowns. He diligently sticks with the unfolding drama (much of it caused by Isaiah’s actions) even as it threatens the foundations of his family. The film never judges, nor does it condone — a testament to Jeremiah’s strength as a director. Instead, In a Dream is deeply rooted in reality, offering an interesting examination of genius versus madness, devotion versus enabling, and the handcuff-like bonds of love. 3 stars (out of 5) —A.W.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Dance Flick

My review of the new Wayans' movie, Dance Flick, is online at WestEnder.com

DANCE FLICK

2 stars (out of 5)

The next generation of the Wayans family has risen, and say what you will about their forefathers (and mothers), this is a family that thrives on accomplishing things together. By IMDB.com’s humble estimation, there are at least 11 Wayans siblings of varying ages who acted in, produced, executive produced, wrote, directed, composed music, and lord-knows-what-else for this, their latest pop-culture-skewering satire.

And damned if it isn’t laugh-out-loud funny a few times. Megan (Shoshanna Bush), a white girl who transfers to a primarily black school, just wants to dance. She’s quickly befriended by Charity (Essence Atkins), a 21-year-old just finishing high school who brings her baby with her everywhere she goes. Charity’s brother, Thomas (an incredibly charming Damon Wayans Jr.), who catches Megan’s eye, just happens to be part of a dance crew. Megan and Thomas spend time dancing and dating, but Megan is battling demons about not getting into Julliard and causing her mother’s death, and Thomas is worried about coming up with the money he owes to gangster Sugarbear (David Alan Grier, who seems to relish the wearing of a fat suit) after his crew lost the last dance-off.

As in their Scary Movie franchise, the Wayans don’t deliver a film so much as 90 minutes stuffed with sight gags, one-off jokes, and random shout-outs to well-known dance-oriented movies like Save the Last Dance, How She Move, Fame, and High School Musical, to name a few. (Fans of the genre will have fun playing Name That Movie.) The Wayans also have an uncanny ability to cast ridiculously likable and winning people; they gave the world Anna Farris, after all.

But for all of Dance Flick’s smooth moves, there are bone-jarring stops and starts. Within 15 seconds of its opening, there’s a urination gag. Ten seconds after that, a man shoves his head up his own butt. Plenty of other jokes feel a bit dated, which is always the trouble with lampooning pop culture: Celebrity prominence is fleeting, so jokes about Jessica Simpson don’t tickle the funny bone like they used to.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

TV on the Radio

My interview with TV on the Radio was...interesting. Pick up a copy of WE to check it out.

TV on the Radio share a joke, with varying degrees of success.

TV on the Radio share a joke, with varying degrees of success.

Brooklyn-based TV on the Radio already has legions of adoring fans. The quintet’s unique sound — an amalgamation of disparate influences from Britpop to Afrojazz — and electric live shows have spawned a diverse following, from teen Goth-lite types to pot-smoking neo-hippies.

TVOTR’s founders, Tunde Adebimpe (vocals) and David Sitek (keyboards, guitar), were joined by guitarist and vocalist Kyp Malone for the group’s debut EP, Young Liars. Their first full-length album, 2004’s Desperate Youth, Blood Thirsty Babes, featured the band’s complete lineup, rounded out by drummer Jaleel Bunton and bassist Gerard Smith. Always critically lauded, TVOTR’s last two albums, 2006’s Return to Cookie Mountain and 2008’s Dear Science, claimed the top spot on best-of-year lists from Rolling Stone to the U.K.’s The Guardian.

So, after eight years in an increasingly intense spotlight, one might think TVOTR would have a better handle on the art of self-promotion, but videotaped interviews with the group often reveal men who seem to be in on a joke that only they get. Though friendly and affable, it’s not unusual to see one of them trail off mid-sentence, and then start laughing — an effect not dissimilar to sitting in a hotboxed basement and watching your friends talk about “deep stuff.”

Entertaining? Sure, at times, but it’s not terribly conducive to crafting a compelling story. WE’s first scheduled interview with Malone, while on the road for TVOTR’s summer tour, came and went, as he was nowhere to be found. Take two with the cordial but curious fellow went off without a hitch. Kind of.

How many of these interviews do you have to do today?

Malone: Just two. It’s one of my favourite things to do, so I really feel it’s a privilege.

Really? What do you like about it?

[Laughs] I don’t like doing anything about it! I was just kidding. But I don’t mind talking to you.

You’ve talked a little bit in the past about your experiences listening to the first incarnation of TVOTR, before you joined.

When I first heard them, I didn’t really get it. [Long pause] But it sounded like people having fun. It was kind of a free-for-all show where anyone was getting on stage with them and performing. [Long pause] Is that not the part that you’re talking about? You’re talking about another thing I’ve said a hundred times before?

I was just wanting you to say it in your own words, so I didn’t have to paraphrase somebody else’s.

[Laughs] Right. Um, I remember being very, very, very impressed listening to the Young Liars EP. It felt like, uh, a real record. Which isn’t to take away from any of the other — I don’t know, I was impressed by the sounds of it. It felt very formidable. I felt very proud of it.

What kind of music did you make before joining TVOTR?

I made the same kind of music I make now, but just a younger version of myself, with not as much experience, and without the influences of this time. I was making rock music and experimental music and a bunch of different stuff.

Do you have any themes you like to go back to when you’re writing songs?

Um, there aren’t themes I like to go back to. There are themes that I do go back to. I’m not trying to. I’d like to be diverse in life and experiences, but themes about family and relationships and religion and politics... But, I don’t know. I’m reading about mythologies a lot lately... I just got a book of Haida stories, which I didn’t bring on tour, and I’m actually kicking myself about it, although there’s not a lot of time.

Are you guys working on your next record?

Nope. We’re working on doing the best job we can as a live band, and really making the show a fantastic, supersonic, and psycho-spiritual thing... I’m just saying words now.

Camping getaways close to the city

I forgot to post my urban camping story for getaways as close as 30 minutes to the city.

By Andrea Warner

Weekend camping getaways can feel like a lot more effort than they’re worth: stuffing a tent, sleeping bags, food and other provisions into the car, then spending hours driving to the Interior or the Okanagan, only to set up your campsite for 36 hours before taking it all down and hitting the long road back home. We know you have better ways to spend your time, so we’ve rounded up the quickest and closest ways to help you commune with nature — as little as 30 minutes from your favourite downtown Starbucks and the soothing sounds of the outdoors.

30-44 MINUTES
•Dogwood Campgrounds

Quiet, affordable, and within minutes of a major mall if you start freaking out about being so far from the city. Dogwood offers campsites, RV sites, and a little grocery store for mini-emergencies. And there’s an on-site playground in which children can run themselves ragged, ensuring early bedtimes for everyone. (15151 112th Ave., Surrey; DogwoodCampgrounds.com)

•Mt. Seymour
If you’re feeling truly adventurous and ready to leave behind the luxuries of city living, Mt. Seymour permits walk-in/wilderness camping in its back-country. Enter north of Brockton Point and stay as long as you like (but no open fires). It’s a beautiful forested environment during the summer and dense with snow during the winter, but there aren’t many amenities, so make sure to bring enough food and water for your stay (and garbage bags to clean up after yourself). A group campsite for larger parties can be reserved by calling 604-986-2261, ext. 214. (1700 Mt. Seymour Road, North Vancouver; Env.Gov.BC.ca/BCParks)

45-60 MINUTES
•Fort Camping

Located in Brae Island Regional Park, Fort Camping offers beach access, kayaking lessons, and plenty of supervised activities for kids, allowing parents their own playtime. Upcoming theme weekends this month include a Mother’s Day tea party, a “Nifty ’50s” retro long weekend (complete with Elvis impersonator), a pet show, and a chocolate festival! Fort Camping also provide sites for all sizes — tents, campers, and RVs. (9451 Glover Rd., Ft. Langley; FortCamping.com)

•Hazelmere
RV hookups, tent camping, and cabins — this is the perfect set-up for those looking to test the camping waters. Cabins sleep up to five, and offer a TV, barbecue, and a mini fridge. But be prepared: The cabins don’t have running water or bathrooms, so you can still say you’re roughing it even if you bring your 700-thread-count sheets. (18843 8th Ave., Surrey; Hazelmere.ca)

60-90 MINUTES
•Paradise Valley

Halfway up the Sea-to-Sky Highway, but worth the journey, this campsite is nestled in the wilderness, and promotes learning about its eco systems while navigating the trails and waterways that have solidified its reputation as a nature sanctuary. On the upside: giant scoops of ice cream. Downside: pay showers. (3520 Paradise Rd., Squamish; ParadiseValleyCampground.net)

•Rolley Lake Provincial Park
The warm-water lake is a nice alternative to freezing your bits off, and the predominantly flat landscape makes hiking a breeze for novice nature enthusiasts. If it’s true adventure you’re looking for, try your hand at paddling around the lake in a canoe, or fishing for your supper (but get a license!). (Dewdney Trunk and Bell Rd., Maple Ridge; Env.Gov.BC.ca/BCParks)

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Americans In France

My story about the post-punk band Americans in France is in the Charleston City Paper this week.

Americans in France twist a funny sound

Not So Silly?

myspace.com/americansinfrance

They're slim and scrappy ... the type of young adults who thrive on a steady diet of sarcasm, silliness, and at least one photo-op in a sex swing — that is, they're perfect candidates to start a post-punk noise band with a completely nonsensical name like Americans in France.

Former Floridian Josh Lajoie, AIF's singer/guitarist, possesses the nasal twangy voice of his punk forefathers, and he's working on his meaty snarl. He shares vocal duties with drummer Casey Cook, who happens to be a renowned artist. Kent Howard makes up the third part of the AIF triangle, providing pounding bass lines and terrifically funny one-liners.

The trio riff off each other naturally, and their camaraderie comes through even during an interview via e-mail. They're eagerly anticipating the release of their newest album, Pretzelvania. Indie bloggers and established sites like Pitchfork.com have been kind to several tracks, and AIF still can't get over the fact that Pretzelvania boasts the fingerprints of Grammy award-winning producer/engineer Brian Paulson.

"It was surprising to have the opportunity to work with Paulson, and that he came to our house to do it!" Lajoie says. "Essentially he was cooped up with us. We felt very comfortable." Lajoie and Cook's home served as the de-facto studio, but while its idyllic location in Chatham, N.C., fostered plenty of creative spirit, it also meant that any time of day one could hear AIF's blistering punk shattering the countryside.

"We live on a pond which is basically a giant amphitheater of sound," Cook says. "While we were recording, a lady that lives across the pond would turn her stereo on full blast to illustrate that point every once in a while."

"Her taste in music was surprisingly good," Lajoie adds.

They're equally glib about their unusual name and their songwriting practices.

On their unique moniker, Cook says she imagines spy-type ex-pats living in France, drinking absinthe, smoking fancy cigarettes, and eating baguettes, whereas Lajoie envisions fat tourists in NASCAR T-shirts with bad attitudes. He does admit that fellow Floridian Jim Morrison's defection to France may have also inspired the band's name.

When it comes to crafting their songs, which sometimes come off as impassioned mini-manifestos and sly cultural criticisms ("Mr. Fister" and "Nosejob" come to mind), Lajoie gleefully admits to a controlled chaos. "In the beginning, we'd write songs while we were walking down the street together," he says. "I steal a lot of my lyrics from things people have said to me or from weird movies."

"I'll have words and a melody and bring it to the band knowing it will be filtered through everyone's brain and come out sounding like our song," Cook says.

"We call that not being afraid to kill the baby," Howard adds.

This quick quip is just another example that for all the fury Americans in France pack into their songs, their shared sense of humor is steadily humming below the surface. Or, in certain cases, part of a photo gallery on their MySpace page, which lead this nosy writer to come across a picture of a man fully clothed, joyfully leaning backwards, spread eagle, in a sex swing.

"Yeah, that's me," Lajoie confesses. "Busted. What can I say? Florida chews you up and spits you out."

Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Kills

My interview with Jamie Hince of the Kills appears in print and online for WE (WestEnder.com)

The Kills’ Alison Mosshart patiently waits for bandmate Jamie Hince to wake up.

The Kills’ Alison Mosshart patiently waits for bandmate Jamie Hince to wake up.

Lost and Found with the Kills

When WE interviewed the Kills’ Jamie Hince last week, we had no idea we were conversing with a missing person. According to reports discovered after the fact, Kills vocalist Alison Mosshart had put out a call on her Facebook page earlier that day, asking if anyone had seen or heard from the guitarist since the band’s Montreal gig the night before. They were just hours away from showtime in Toronto, and Hince was nowhere to be found.

Groggy and tired-sounding, Hince didn’t seem like a man on the run when we spoke over the phone in the midst of his 16-hour disappearing act. He blamed his rusty pipes on the non-stop action of New York City, where the Kills played a couple of shows before Montreal. He admitted that New York shows are, for him, the most anxiety-inducing. “The record industry people come, and that makes me nervous,” he says. “They’re not the kind of people I like at my shows.”

The kind of people who do frequent Kills shows are often described as too-cool hipsters or fashionista types — an audience the band has willingly cultivated from the beginning. The Kills’ high-energy blues-rock is gritty and sexy, but also slightly art-school; during their first few years of fame, Hince and Mosshart often copped to wanting to recreate Andy Warhol’s Factory.

Hince proves to be funny, sweet, and unguarded throughout our interview — a different man than the one depicted in the tabloids as the on-again, off-again arm candy of supermodel Kate Moss, or by music journalists who seem fixated on portraying the Kills as tough-as-nails, arty intellectuals who ooze sexual tension with their “Are they or aren’t they?” stage presence. Hince shrugs it off as best he can.

“I think it’s a hard thing, writing about music,” he says. “It’s not an enviable job. Vocabulary’s so small these days, you’ve got bands described as a cross between this, that, and something else. It’s hard to describe music without falling into that category of talking in clichés. There’s not that romantic writing anymore that’s gonna be seen in a frame behind glass or as art in a museum piece, as it used to be.”

Making art is all the Kills have ever wanted to do, an earnest declaration that’s been applauded and mocked since the band’s 2003 debut, Keep on Your Mean Side, which is just now being re-released with five bonus tracks. That will have to suffice as a bridge between 2008’s Midnight Boom and the band’s next album, which likely won’t see the light of day until 2010. Hince explains that even though the duo don’t write songs on the road, that’s where the creative process starts.

“What we do is write loads, take pictures, paint and draw and take photographs, and at the end of it we have this huge collection of odds and sods and all sorts of different things,” he says. “Then that becomes a weird sort of journal that starts the next record. It always starts with an aesthetic for us.”

Hince’s voice becomes fully animated. “I think if you come up with something really true and original, it will sound a bit nasty, it will sound a bit ugly,” he says. “I think Picasso said something about that, like you have to run faster than beauty. We did that with Midnight Boom. I was sick of these ’60s and ’70s guitar tones and drum sounds. I really went overboard to try and make a sound that was not like a beautiful guitar sound, but really harsh and ugly.”

The current tour is likely the last push in support of Midnight Boom. When it’s over, Mosshart will spend some time performing with Jack White of the White Stripes in their new side project, the Dead Weather. Hince also has a few other music-based ventures in the works, but he declines to go on record about them, citing “superstition.” He will, however, confirm that he and Mosshart are already working on the Kills’ fourth album.

“I’ve written a couple of songs, but we write songs in so many weird ways,” he says, laughing. “Most of the time it’s on a one-string guitar, with some vague ideas, and you never really know until you get to the studio what sort of style it’s going to be done in. That’s when I sort of go all funny and stuff.”

Friday, May 8, 2009

Only

Only is absolutely wonderful. A great Canadian film!

ONLY
Starring Jacob Switzer, Elena Hudgins Lyle
Directed by Ingrid Veninger and Simon Reynolds
4 stars (out of 5)

By Andrea Warner
From its simple title to its familiar premise (couple meets and has just one day together), Only has been called Before Sunset for the tween set. It’s a valid comparison, but it doesn’t accurately reflect the film’s real accomplishment: a Canadian indie that is understated, natural, bittersweet, and hopeful.

Twelve-year-old Daniel (Jacob Switzer) is an only child whose hippie parents operate a motel in rural Ontario. Vera (Elena Hudgins Lyle) is 13 years old and staying at the motel en route to Brampton with her dysfunctional parents. Together, the two wander through the snow — bright spots of coloured toques, scarves, and knee-high boots leaving a trail of footprints all over the town and surrounding woods.

As normal kids toeing the line between innocence and adulthood and forced to make up for their parents’ shortcomings, Switzer and Lyle are revelations. They make nuanced choices to reflect children with vivid imaginations who are used to entertaining themselves and bearing their burdens alone.

Only is the first joint production between filmmakers Ingrid Veninger and Simon Reynolds, who also co-star as both sets of parents. The writer/director/producer duo ensure that Daniel and Vera are never talked down to or dismissed. They trust their young actors to improvise, enriching the film’s authenticity. But most significantly, they use long tracking shots to follow the children from a distance and swoop in periodically for close ups, relying on the landscape’s natural beauty to convey the lonely but often magical quality of small-town living.

Lymelife

LYMELIFE
Starring Rory Culkin, Kieran Culkin
Directed by Steven Martini
2 stars (out of 5)

By Andrea Warner
Like a suffocating hug to the bosom of an overbearing aunt, Steven and Derick Martini smother their indie labour-of-love drama with too much personal involvement and not enough outside help. Not only did the brothers pen the script to Lymelife’s semi-autobiographical ode to late-’70s suburban discontent, but Steven directed and Derick served as both a producer and composer.

Scott (Rory Culkin) is a vulnerable 15-year-old in suburban Long Island, attempting to weather the storm of his dysfunctional family and his devastating crush on the girl next door. He and older brother Jimmy (Kieran Culkin) are helpless witnesses to the dissolution of their parents’ marriage: Brenda (Jill Hennessy) is caught in the grips of Lyme disease paranoia, and Mickey (Alec Baldwin) is a workaholic womanizer. Mickey’s latest fling is next-door neighbour Melissa (Cynthia Nixon), the long-suffering wife of Charlie (Timothy Hutton), a man who’s sunk into a deep depression after being diagnosed with Lyme disease. Bringing it all full circle is their daughter, the lovely Adriana (Emma Roberts), who is the object of young Scott’s affections.

Performances by the high-powered cast rise well above the material, particularly in scenes involving the Culkin brothers, who infuse every exchange with genuine emotion. Although convoluted, the script offers moments of refreshing subtlety. But the limited scope of the Martini brothers’ imagination is glaringly obvious from the outset: The increasingly sick and depressed Charlie starts having hallucinations and becomes obsessed with rifles and hunting — an all-too-easy recipe for disaster that telegraphs the gist of the ending within minutes of the opening frame, thereby rendering Lymelife practically stillborn.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Lewis Black

My interview with Lewis Black appears online and in print for WE (WestEnder).
Comedian Lewis Black is kidding — maybe — when he says Canada has begun testing his affections. “I had all this respect for you people, but I think it’ll crumble.”

Comedian Lewis Black is kidding — maybe — when he says Canada has begun testing his affections. “I had all this respect for you people, but I think it’ll crumble.”

For Lewis Black, it’s a full day of back-to-back interviews with Canadian media, but when this writer offers the 60-year-old comedian a chance to hang up after the allotted 15 minutes, he cheerfully declines, saying, “If I don’t keep talking to you, I’ll just have to get up and wander around or find some other way to occupy myself.”

Nice-guy ribbing from one of comedy’s most curmudgeonly characters? It makes sense when you think about the company he keeps: Known associates include Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, fellow Comedy Central funnymen with politically-minded crosses to bear; and Black’s rise to fame can be attributed largely to frequent guest spots on Stewart’s The Daily Show, where his comedic mini-tirades, performed under the title “Back in Black,” hint that he’s just one injustice away from a coronary.

WE caught up with Black over the phone from his home base of New York City, where he was rant-ready on everything from legalizing pot to American Idol.

This tour is called Dual Citizenship. Do you have a secret wish to be Canadian?
Black: At times I’ve had more than a secret wish, starting the first time they were picking numbers in the draft lottery [for the Vietnam War]. The night before, when I went to sleep, I thought, “I hope I wake up and I’m in Calgary.” Especially after the last eight years, I’ve always had that wistful, “Ohhhh. Oh, Canada.” Also, things like the Trailer Park Boys: I know a few of them now, and if I could only have been a Trailer Park Boy! Those guys kill me.

How much of your material focuses on Canada?
Well, the nice thing about this tour is that I’m finally in Canada for a length of time, so my hope is that by the time I get to Vancouver I’ll have a good 20 minutes on Canada. [Laughs] I mean, I just heard that your Minister of Science [Gary Goodyear] is a Creationist. Holy... I mean, that’s five minutes for me! Nothin’ better than a Creationist in charge of science. I had all this respect for you people, but I think it’ll crumble. I’ll be lookin’ to get citizenship in... oh, God knows. What country’s left? Costa Rica. I’ll move on.

The global economy has crapped out, and I wanted to talk to you about California pussyfooting around the idea of legalizing and taxing marijuana.
Yeah, good for them! For the first time, I’m pushing that in my act: pushing legalization. I’ve never pushed for anything, but I’m sick of this, and I don’t even smoke it. But, come on! My generation has not accomplished anything. The least we could do is legalize pot. We can’t even get medical marijuana done! It is stupid — profoundly stupid — when your largest cash crop in three to five states is marijuana. What’s the matter with you? A country of morons. Fucking how dumb are you? And we’ve got Hillary Clinton goin’, “Oh, it’s our insatiable drug needs.” Well, yeah! What are you gonna fuckin’ do, Hillary? Go door to door and talk people off the ledge?

People talk about it as this gateway drug to crack and heroin.
Yeah, you know what it is? A gateway to the fuckin’ refrigerator. You know what that fuckin’ is? It’s like going back to Reefer Madness. People don’t smoke pot and go, “Oh boy! What’s next?” They go, “Where can I get another bag of this shit?” But fine, you don’t wanna legalize pot? Fine, you gotta stop drinking. That’s it. Then I’m moving to France where I can drink my wine. [Laughs]

You’ve called yourself a socialist. What does being a socialist mean to you?
I got tired of the Democrat and Republican models. I’ve always felt, for a long, long time, that everyone only needs a certain amount of money. The argument’s always been, oh, if you can only make a certain amount of money, where are they going to get their drive? Well, maybe if they enjoyed what they’re doing, they’d have drive, you asshole! I was broke for most of my life, and I never had a problem with drive, and it wasn’t so I could make money; it was so I could do my stuff. Especially over the last 20 years of my life, the greed level’s just risen exponentially year by year.

What’s the most evil thing in pop culture right now?
American Idol is a disturbing, giant, gaping hole. If you were flying in an airplane at 30,000 feet and the door came off and people were sucked through the door — much like that is American Idol. And they’ve pulled the door off of the plane and music’s been sucked out. This is the way you’re discovering people? Are you fucking kidding me? I did comedy for years, and I didn’t even start ’til I was 40, but I went out there every night, and that’s what you do. You don’t fucking do a week’s worth of work and get a hair stylist and sing love songs. This is the way you discover talent? Talent really does everything it can to learn about its talent. There’s no learning experience. You can have a certain amount of star quality, but presence comes with taking a bunch of punches, so that when you’re performing you can go, I’m in charge here. I’m on stage, so shut the fuck up.